NASA, I’m Breaking Up With You

moon

It’s over. We’ve both known this was a long time coming. Things just feel stagnant, you know? I mean, at first, we were both exciting and passionate. You gave me the moon! You took me places I’d never been before! But now, well, we’ve gotten into a rut. We just go to the same place over and over. We never do anything new. We talked about our problems, and I was really hopeful when you started talking about a real moon colony or even a trip to Mars!

A hot virgin

But you put those things off again and again, even though you knew how important they were to me. I need a space program that’s as active and passionate as I am! Now, I know what you’re going to say, and I won’t lie to you. Yes, this is partially about Virgin Galactic, but I don’t know if that’s going to end up being the program for me. I just know I can’t be with you anymore.

I can’t sit here day after day, watching you waste all the money I give you and doing nothing with your life. Other space companies are out there, building spaceports and testing low-cost rockets! And you’re taking a step backward with your old liquid-fuel rocket ideas from the 60s? I don’t know what to say. That’s not the National Aeronautics and Space Program I fell in love with.

Goodbye, NASA.

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