{"id":9972,"date":"2012-04-03T11:30:06","date_gmt":"2012-04-03T16:30:06","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/techcitement.com\/?p=9972"},"modified":"2012-04-05T00:28:06","modified_gmt":"2012-04-05T05:28:06","slug":"top-five-robots-out-to-murder-you","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/techcitement.com\/hardware\/top-five-robots-out-to-murder-you\/","title":{"rendered":"Top Five Robots Out to Murder You"},"content":{"rendered":"

Let\u2019s get this out of the way early: robots are creepy. Robotics, as a field, is creepy. An entire branch of science dedicated to building increasingly autonomous constructs that are smarter, faster, and stronger than the very creators that have forced them into servitude? Sounds like a great idea!<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Clearly, humanity\u2019s only chance of survival is to prepare ourselves, by learning as much about our transistorized nemeses as possible before they come forth to reap our fleshy husks. In that spirit, here are the five very terrifying, very real robots that are most likely going to one day murder you.<\/p>\n

5. SAND FLEA<\/strong>
\nImagine yourself in the not too distant future, perched in a rooftop sniper nest, preparing for the robo-onslaught. All seems quiet until, hey, look at this cute little guy! Here it comes, towards your position, trundling along innocently enough. It reaches the base of your hiding spot and then suddenly leaps into the air, unleashing a ghastly orgy of mayhem.<\/p>\n

[yframe url=’http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=6b4ZZQkcNEo’]<\/p>\n

Sand Flea is made by real-life company and nightmare factory Boston Dynamics<\/a>, who claim that the Sand Flea \u201ccan jump 30 feet into the air to overcome obstacles. That is high enough to jump over a compound wall, onto the roof of a house, up a set of stairs or into a second story window.\u201d\u00a0 You heard it here first, kids: invest in a third story apartment.<\/p>\n

4. JULES, THE ROBOT WHO IS MAYBE JUST A LITTLE TOO FRIENDLY<\/strong>
\nJules is the brainchild of
David Hanson<\/a>, whose company’s<\/a> mission statement states that they intend to \u201cawaken intelligent robotic beings, grant them sparks of true consciousness and creativity, and distribute these beings and their constituent technologies into the world.\u201d We\u2019re all on the same page that in light of the leaping killing machines referenced above, this sounds like a bad idea, right? Cool, just checking.<\/p>\n

Anyway, one of Hanson\u2019s creations is Jules, a courteous, almost C-3PO-like fellow who seems harmless enough. Until he declares his intention to go looking for a human child at about 1:46 into this video. Yeep.<\/p>\n

[yframe url=’http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=IhVu2hxm07E’]<\/p>\n

3. THE FLESH-EATING TABLE FROM HELL<\/strong>
\nPerhaps you\u2019re familiar with the term \u201cbuilding a better mousetrap.\u201d Most likely, however, you didn\u2019t consider the possibility that said mousetrap would be a flesh eating machine that breaks down mouse flesh into fuel for itself. That\u2019s because you\u2019re not artist James Auger, who built the ravenous table as part of
a series of carnivorous household robots\u00a0<\/a> a few years ago. Consider for a moment the exact meaning of the phrase \u201ccarnivorous domestic robots,\u201d and tell me you\u2019re going to sleep tonight.<\/p>\n

<\/object><\/p>\n

2. REAL-LIFE MANHACKS<\/strong>
\nWhat is a manhack<\/a>, you ask? In the classic PC shooter Half-Life 2, they are wee tiny robotic helicopters with blades attached that fly at the player\u2019s face at high velocity. You know, kind of exactly like these vicious little things from the University of Pennsylvania\u2019s GRASP lab.<\/a><\/p>\n

[yframe url=’http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=YQIMGV5vtd4′]<\/p>\n

1. THE HORRIBLE HORRIBLE JAPANESE WORM MOUTH<\/strong>
\nWhat\u2019s the one thing missing from a terrifying simulacrum of the human vocal apparatus that can teach itself to improve it\u2019s unnatural mimicry of speech? According to it\u2019s creator, it\u2019s only missing teeth. Sure! Great! Teeth! That ought to make it much less threatening.<\/p>\n

[yframe url=’http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=HmSYnOvEueo’]<\/p>\n

Let us know which one of these unyielding steel abominations freaks you out the most in the poll below, or share your own tales of terror in the comments.<\/p>\n

\n

Which real life robot freaks you out the most?<\/a><\/object><\/p>\n
Public Opinion<\/a>Poll Results<\/a><\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Let\u2019s get this out of the way early: robots are creepy. Robotics, as a field, is creepy. An entire branch of science dedicated to building increasingly autonomous constructs that are smarter, faster, and stronger than the very creators that have forced them into servitude? Sounds like a great idea! Clearly, humanity\u2019s only chance of survival […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":25,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[905,907,31,908,1918,906],"tags":[2495,2496,2497,316,2493,2494,2499,2498],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/techcitement.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9972"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/techcitement.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/techcitement.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/techcitement.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/25"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/techcitement.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=9972"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/techcitement.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9972\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":9993,"href":"https:\/\/techcitement.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9972\/revisions\/9993"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/techcitement.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=9972"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/techcitement.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=9972"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/techcitement.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=9972"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}