I like the word cunt. Along with fuck, cunt is one of my favorite words. In my native South London, I use it as punctuation. A noun, a verb, and an adjective. Savoring the hard C, the drawn out U, ending in the satisfying NT. A word that is like the sex it describes, just as the word fuck is as satisfying as the act it announces. These are the most profane words we can use, and my friends and I, we use them like lovers. We are a shower of cunts, a bunch of useless fuckers, daft cunts, silly cunts.
Please, though, do not call us idiots. We’re not stupid. We’re not daft. We are fucking cunts. Raise our ire, and you too, can be a cunt. A stupid cunt. A useless cunt. Cunty cunt cunt. We use the word in excess, until it loses meaning. So that when we use it in anger, you are no longer the angry cunt, but the void left in its place. Such is the joy in the intricacies of British English — that a word used to offend is used to imply it’s complete lack of offense on the part of the interferer. The word becomes the lack of a word, and simultaneously it encompasses all of its meanings. A void, an absence, worthless, worthy, an object of desire, a subject of obsession.
When it comes to mockery, Twitter is good for that. I can instantly heap my scorn and disdain along with thousands of other people, and I can do so in real time. In fact, some nine million tweets were sent about the Oscars last night. Here are some mocking tweets I wrote about the Oscars. I’m not proud.
https://twitter.com/tim12s/status/305861693026742272
https://twitter.com/tim12s/status/305870926610849793
https://twitter.com/tim12s/status/305878420343111681
And right then, in the middle of my own admittedly inflammatory tweets, The Onion, who was also live-tweeting, fucked up. I mean, seriously fucked up.
No. Just, no.
The Onion called a nine-year old African-American child a cunt. As I’ve said, I’m not afraid of the word, but I’m not an asshole. Nor am I a multimillion dollar media outlet whose stock in trade is humor. I’m some foul-mouthed bloke who writes about technology every now and again. What am I not? Someone who goes around calling black children cunts. That’s just awful.
I like the Oscars. I like mocking the rich, the powerful. I want to stay on top of my pop-culture game. I want to discuss when their glamor falls to the ground, how their set design looks like an East L.A. Auto-Shop, when Seth MacFarlane makes off-color comments and then feign outrage. Or that those same people are genuinely outraged at MacFarlane’s sexism and racism-lite that passes for contemporary American culture when he:
- Sings a song with a litany of movies that serve as fap-fodder.
- Suggests Quvenzhané Wallis (nine-year-old star of Beasts Of The Southern Wild) be phased in as George Clooney’s sexual partner in 16 years.
- Says that, “Django is a movie where a woman is subjected to violence, or as we call it, a Chris Brown and Rihanna date movie.”
- Uses his Ted fursona to make jokes about Jews and underage rape.
Buzzfeed followed the Oscars by starting to run a piece called 6 Sexist Things That Happened At The Oscars. By the time the Oscars were over, the article was updated to nine things. Despite Buzzfeed’s general awfulness and lust for clicks, they do, on occasion, hit on the money.
What other industry openly mocks women, ethnic minorities, gays, rape, domestic violence, and then gets paid millions of dollars to do so? And when given 60 seconds to talk, cuts off mentions of its visual effects artists who were protesting outside after 44 seconds with the Jaws 2 theme.
An hour later, The Onion deleted its offensive tweet.
This morning, The Onion’s CEO issued a formal apology on Facebook for calling Quvenzhané Wallis a cunt. Seth MacFarlane, however, will still continue to get a hefty paycheck from Fox.
Well you did a good job of cunting up this article, Fucking have to read through the whole thing to find the tiny bit about the subject the headline alludes to
Such a potty mouth!
It was a play on his article’s start, about cunting and fucking.